40 Things I Dislike
I was recently invited to participate in the 40 Things I Love challenge that’s been floating around Medium. As I worked on my list, it dawned on me that I could just as easily come up with a list of 40 things I don’t love. And thus, a new challenge was born.
I was going to call it “40 Things I Hate,” but that’s a bit too harsh. I mean, I hate global warming. I hate incompetent politicians who use citizens as pawns to further their petty agendas. I hate homophobic, racist vitriol that is spewed forth in the name of God.
But, that’s not what I’m going for here. This is more of a “it drives me crazy when…” kind of list. A “man, it gets under my skin when…” kinda list. A rant in listicle form, if you will.
So, here goes. This is a list of 40 things I dislike.
1. The sound and feel of packed, crunching snow under my feet.
2. Great books with terrible endings. The kind where it seems like maybe the author realized their book was due to the agent the next day but they spent so much time on the first two-thirds of the book all they could do was whip up some asinine conclusion at the last minute.
3. Waking up to find a puddle of cat puke right at the bottom of the stairs.
4. An overly-full email In-box that never empties, no matter how many emails I delete.
5. My iPhone, which has become the bane of my existence.
6. Getting that oh-so-perfect idea for a story or an article or a sentence just as I’m drifting off to sleep….
7. Being indecisive. Which I am. Sometimes. Or maybe a lot? I don’t know.
9. This song and anyone involved in its creation.
10. Being woken up in the middle of the night by my kid and then exposed to just enough light that it’s impossible to fall back to sleep.
11. Drivers who cut me off or won’t let me into their lane, but then give me the finger.
12. Head colds that linger for an eternity.
13. Weekends and vacations that go by way too fast.
14. Coffee and its bitter, pungent scent.
15. Staring at a blank screen and having no idea what to write, as if all understanding of the craft has been sucked completely out of my skull.
16. Unexplained, ambiguous, “how do you think it ended” TV finales.
17. Heavy traffic.
18. People who don’t wipe the puddles of water off bathroom counters in public restrooms.
19. Salads drenched in too much dressing.
20. Snowstorms that make it impossible to leave the house.
21. Dark, dreary, gray, no-sun winter days.
22. Unfunny sitcoms with obnoxious laugh tracks that stay on the air far longer than they should.
23. Plagiarism.
24. The dozens of spam calls I get on my cell phone every day.
25. People who insist on having loud phone conversations in public places.
26. Even worse, people who insist on having loud phone conversations using their cell’s speakerphone.
27. Stand-up comedians who aren’t really funny so they rely on f-bombs to fill in the gaps where the humor should be.
28. The months of January through March, when there are no major holidays or festivities to look forward to. Just weeks and weeks of cold, snowy, blah-ness.
29. Drivers who don’t wave when you let them cut in front of you.
30. Medium’s mysterious algorithms.
31. Seafood. It’s gross and icky and please get it away from me.
32. Unhelpful criticism of my work. (The kind that isn’t intended to make me a better writer but just make the critic feel better about themselves.)
33. Making small talk with strangers.
34. Finding layers of cat fur all over the furniture every day.
35. The closing day of our backyard pool.
36. Spending way too much time promoting my work on social media instead of writing.
37. Publishing a story on Medium and finding a day later that no one has read it.
38. Cardio. I love lifting weights, but hate cardio oh so much.
39. The fact that I still get occasional pain from my c-section six years after my son was born.
40. Never knowing completely if I’m on the right path.
So, there you have it. Forty things I dislike.